Male Brain

He: "Did you see Mrs Greene's son got married? The picture is in The Echo."
She: "Who?"
He: "Mrs Greene. Years ago. The nice lady used to come in for a small drinkie to the pub when we were going out first."
She: "Don't remember."
He: "Yes you do. Big family. I used to know her sons. The second eldest just got married."
She: "Is that the picture with the v-neckline and the confrabaliddle sleeve detail on the cuff over the white-you-may-call-it bustle-a-bob?"
He: "Huh...?"

*****

He: "Went to a wedding on Saturday."

Lots of She workmates: "What was the dress like?"

He: "Em. White...?"

*****

He: "So Claire had a baby boy."

She: "That's nice. What weight was it?"

He: "Urrm..."

*****

He: "Grocery shopping? No problem. What do we need?"

She: "I have a list made."

He: "Okay. If I have to look like a man sent out with a list I shall."

She: "It's a list of all the things we don't need."

He: "Eh.....???"

*****

He: "Shoes? Shop right over here."

She: "No good. Too expensive."

He: "Okay. Another shop over here."

She: "No good. Not as good a variety as the first shop."

He: "But the first one is too expensive."

She: "So...?"

*****

She: "I still don't understand the offside trap."

He: "Easy. If the porcelain cat gets in behind the CD rack before I kick him the cat toy he's offside."

She: "Oh I finally understand! Hang on. No I don't."

*****

She: "Who's that?"

He: "Frodo."

She: "I thought he was Bilbo."

He: "No that's his uncle. He gave him the ring, remember?"

She: "Oh yes. I remember. Sorry..."

She: "Who is that?"

He: "Saruman the White."

She: "You mean Sauron?"

He: "No Saruman. Gandalf's boss."

She: "Gandalf has a boss?"

He: "Yes."

She: "Gollem is a hobbit?"

He: "Yes. He was a hobbit a long time ago."

She: "He doesn't look like a hobbit."

He: "No. He's very old and the ring has corrupted him."

She: "What ring?"

She: "You hate me don't you?"

He: "No. I love you."

She: "How much."

He: "T-h-i-s much."

She: "Am I ruining the movie for you?"

He: "No. That's what they invented Pause buttons for."

She: "Who's that...?"

*****